- They have this thing called a “cut-over weekend“. This is when the customer (and/or your employer) reminds you that your sexual organs remain firmly secured within the vice grips of your manager. The actual definition comes from the Latin phrase “terminus socialus life-us”, which translates into English as “we are taking control over your weekend and too bad for your personal life“
- They have another thing called “after hours work“, which is as you might have guessed: after normal working hours.
News flash: Once you are assigned as a salaried worker, for most of us mere mortals anyway, means “normal working hours” are midnight to midnight, but thankfully, only on days that end with a “y”.
Other things I should’ve included, and maybe I’ll consume enough wine to publish a new version of the latter book mentioned previously, are the following:
- Priority Projects <> Priority Management directives. That’s right. Sometimes you have more than one boss. And sometimes, those bosses don’t agree. But that doesn’t mean you have a clear kung fu stick for which to fight back either.
- Deferred work <> Delayed Deadlines. This is the worst, evil-brained, multi-headed beast known to mankind/womankind. Think of it as winning the lottery later in life, but you still die on the same date. Kind of the same, only less fun.
Imagine if you and I could drink some beers together, and I impart this depressing wisdom upon you. How long before you reached for the nearest sharp object and ended it. I doubt I’d have time to pull out a stopwatch and try to measure the time it would take.
Me: “Okay, I’m going to see how long it takes for you to…” (gagging and coughing sounds, loud thump as body hits the floor).
You: “Check please!”