You are called in investigate a failed server at douchex corporation. The server is a critical component in the manufacturing process for making hydraulic sex toys. Every minute the server is not operating means thousands of dollars of list revenue. Not to mention hundreds of depressed customers.

The server is running Microsoft Windows Server 2012 R2 enterprise edition with GUI. It has 256 GB of memory and a SAN attached with 50 TB of storage space. It hosts Hyper-V with 18 guest machines. Some are clustered into SQL Server clusters and some are web service load balancers. A few are dedicated to Azure cloud synchronization and ADFS.

What do you do now?  Select all that apply and place them in the correct order.

A. Crap your undergarments.

B. Stutter a lot.

C. Swallow a 5 Hour energy drink,  smash the bottle on your forehead and shout out “3 pointer!”,  toss the bottle in a trash can, with a huge grin.

D. Start googling.

E. Explain that you don’t work in IT,  you just clean toilets, but that you’ll go find the IT person right away.

F. Google some more.


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